Necessity is the mother of invention!

My title says it. I would not have believed it if I had not seen it with my own two eyes. That's Rohan trying to close the microwave door. Obviously, it is too tall for him, so what does he do? He bends down, opens the cupboards beneath the counter, picks out a flat bottomed colander and positions it right below the microwave and stands on top of it and then tries to close the door!! I was amazed when I saw him doing it for the first time. He is 19 months old and what brains for that age!!!!

I have been constantly amazed and floored by these two boys of mine. Their older sister Kahini was a different kettle of fish. A diffident child - she was by no means slow in activity but not as destructive and innovative as these two. It probably helped that Kahini was in day care by 14 months and she let off a lot of steam there. By the time I got her home at 5pm, she was pooped and so was I. All we wanted was to eat dinner and read books. Dad used to take her to the park and the library once in a while. Having said that, after raising Kahini , it is a shock to the system to handle these two.

I am not looking forward to the teenage years with hormones raging out of control and two boys eating me out of home and hearth. Rohan had two scrambled eggs today. I was stunned. Kahini eats two eggs now and she is four!!

Anyway, I hope to be blogging more about my darling boys in the future. Watch this column folks!!!


Kay

Obama's Running Partner

This I've got to share! I was working out with my personal trainer Jim at 24 Hour Fitness last Thursday. It was my usual intense personal training session and I was really working hard and was very focused. A bit of background information on Jim. Jim is a young energetic 22 year old fresh from Oregon. He wanted to try it out at LA as an actor and did a small gig there for a year before he found out that acting was not what he wanted out of life. He moved to the Bay Area and is working as a personal trainer and at the same time doing his online degree in fitness training from Oregon State University at Portland.

Coming back to sweating, while I was working out, I try to indulge in a little bit of light conversation just to take the edge off of my exercise. So, in between my squat and my double press lunge across the room, I started off my conversation.. Here is how it went:

Me: Hey Jim, did you hear about Obama?

Jim: What about him?

Me: He's looking for a new running partner!

Jim: Really?

Me: Yes! Even though he has not got... (Interrupted by Jim!)

Jim: Is he planning on running cross country or long distance or just in the gym?

Me: ??? What?

Jim: What type of running is he planning on doing? Is he an athlete?

Me: What are you talking about?

Jim: Well, what kind of running is he going to be doing?

At this point of time, it dawned on me that Jim had not got a clue about what I was talking about! He literally was thinking about running! He was a personal trainer and had no clue about the Democratic nomination or Obama choosing a vice presidential candidate!

After laughing for about 3 minutes straight along with Jim about his ignorance, I finished my workout and was driving back home. It struck me then I had not laughed about Jim not knowing about Obama's vice presidential hopeful candidates but it was more about how Jim was so refreshing and candid about not knowing the above. He really did not keep track of the Democratic free for all going on everyday. It was like a breath of fresh air. Any newspaper from The New York Times to the Sacramento Bee and any magazine from The New Yorker to Allure - they all have a column, editorial or an article about Hilary and Obama! At this point I am saturated with Obama and Hilary news. I am sick of it. The rivalry, the back stabbing, the public digs, the private phone calls, the preacher, the philandering husband, the cocky daughter.. Enough is enough. About time people started thinking about other things that really matter in life!

Jim opened my eyes that day. He taught me that not everyone is jaded and worked up about the upcoming elections. In fact there are people who don't care a damn. It doesn't matter who wins or loses. At the end of 4 years, there are going to be new problems and new candidates postulating new solutions and cures for the new problems. It's a rat race. There's a rat in front of you and a rat at the back. After 4 years, the rats change. For the public there is no change in scenery. Just a different rat to beat upon.

Happy Exercising!!!

Kay

Thought for Today

Laws Of Success


The greatest mistake - Giving up.
The greatest crippler - Fear.
The greatest handicap - Ego.
The most potent force - Positive.
The greatest victory - Victory over the self.

I got this yesterday from a friend of mine. How apt? The last bullet made sense to me totally. The greatest victory is over oneself. Be it weight loss, lack of confidence, commitment, self esteem to name a few, most of our battles are with ourselves. With our egos, our decisions, our little circle of habits from where it is incredibly hard to step out, etc, etc..

From my 20s to my 40s I've been constantly challenged by various issues like weight loss, anger management, exaggeration and family issues to name a few. It's taken me well over a decade, almost two in fact to get in control of most of these. I am still not in total control for some issues. Still struggling. I wonder if I ever will master them. Knowing me, I would say high nigh impossible.

Anyway, when I read the thought yesterday, it suddenly struck me that a good percentage of the population is probably in the same boat with me. Struggling to win over issues one has with oneself.

Having said that I composed a list of things that I have trouble declaring victory over and I welcome the public to submit theirs. Here it goes in my particular order:

1. Weight loss!!!!!
2. Dealing with relationships.
3. Keeping up with the Joneses.
4. White lies. (Exaggeration.)
5. Self esteem.
6. Shopping.


Let me know people...

Kay

Mummy Leaving

Poor Mummy is leaving for India on Thursday.. She is so distraught at leaving Pallu behind. I can understand her anguish. Pallu - was a difficult child from birth. He has severe eczema issues at birth and for the first 14 months of his life was crying for the better part of the day every day. He did not eat well , did not sleep well and was always in pain from his scratching.

Mom took him on like her own kid. She raised him and fed him and bathed him and made him sleep. Kahini was always daddy's girl and I took care of Rohan. Pravan was patti's pet. Having said that, for her to leave him and go to India must be heart wrenching.

I think about the idioscyncrasies of the human mind. Especially a mother's mind! To have a child, raise him or her, go through the trials and tribulations of early infanthood, childhood, adolescence and teenage tantrums!!! It must be pretty traumatic. After all that , when things just seem to be getting better with one's life after your kids are settled and you get a financial break and just start to take a breather, along comes a grandchild and brings down all your defecnces. The love of a grandchild supercedes the love of a child in many ways I think. Just the fact that one has all the experiences of life behind them and all the time in the world to spend on a child's child is justification enough to love a grandchild. In a grandchild, one sees oneself, one's spouse and also one's kid! It is just too beautiful for words... A beautiful sangamam so to speak..

Having said this, I am very sad that mom is lleaving for India. I will miss her sorely and Pallu will very much miss her...

Take care mom and come back quick...

Love
Kay

Rough Day!

Whew ! What a day?? I've had it. Three kids is not a joke. Mom's not here and is in Vegas taking a well deserved vacation with her sister and nephew. Lucky mom! I've had it with these 3 kids. Not that they are naughty or overly troublesome but just the tedium of handling 3 kids can even get to a saint I imagine.

My day began at 7am. I hopped out of bed, bright eyed and bushy tailed (Okay! So, a little bit of writer's bravado is acceptable. Not exactly bushy tailed but somewhat limp tailed... Big deal!) and tackled the day. Got the boys ready by feeding them milk, got Kahini ready by changing her outfit, brushing her hair and getting her shoes laced up. Got Giri's lunch of chapathi and dhal ready and packed it in his lunch bag. Giri and Kahini left at 8:30am for a doctor's appointment. Made a hasty breakfast of oatmeal for myself and then got the boys ready for breakfast. Chapathi for Rohan and yogurt and idli for Pravan. Pravan is refusing to eat cereal as he used to a few weeks ago. Finished the boys' breakfast and cleaned the kitchen and got them in the bathtub for a soak and got them both ready for bed by 10am. Ms. Tigist my nanny arrived at 10 AM sharp and so I got a break to take a quick shower and then fed Rohan his bottle. 10:30AM, both were ready for a nap, and so I took care of Rohan and nursed him for a little bit and then put him down at 10:45AM. I did some bills and left the house to go work out at 11:45AM. Worked out with Jessica for an hour from 12:30 to 1:30 and then did some cardio for another 10 mts and then hit the road and went to Safeway for some quick groceries.

Came back home by 2pm. grabbed a quick bite to eat and then made cabbage curry and cut the plantains and microwaved them and then took a quick shower. Rohan was ready for his bottle by then, and so after feeding him, ended up nursing him for a bit and by 4pm, I was ready for the rest of the evening. Ran to the post office to do some chores, went to the video store to drop off and pick up some videos, picked up Kahini and came home by 5:45PM. The boys were ready to play by then and after making pasta for Kahini, and finishing the plantain curry, took care of all 3 for 30 minutes. Mayhem.. Mayhem. Pravan bit me and Rohan, Kahini hit Pallu and Rohan screamed at the top of his lungs for 15 mts. God, I wish I could run away to Tahiti for a few days with a blond Norse god.

Giri arrived at 6:45pm and after a few minutes of mayhem again , got Kahini ready for dinner, fed her dinner, ate my dinner and bathed Kahini and then fed Rohan and Pravan their dinner. By then it was 8:30 at night. Got Rohan and Pravan ready for the night by changing them into PJs and brushing their teeth and changing their diapers and feeding them Complan. By 9PM, took Kahini in and brushed her teeth and got her ready for bed, read Elmo Goes For A Checkup for the zillionth time and sang "Alai Payuthey" for her and got her napping by 9:50PM.

Got out and put Rohan to bed and then finally got to blogging. My sanity...

Just another day in the Gopalan household..

You know what they say! "Insanity is hereditary! You get it from your children!!!" So true!

Kay..

Jodha Akbar Review!!

Jodha Akbar - A movie par excellance. I loved it guys. I saw it on the silver screen at AMC Mercado 20 in Santa Clara , USA. What a movie, what a movie. Ashutosh Gowariker has excelled himself I must say. The only negative thing I have to say about the movie is its length. It is almsot 4 hours long. A tad too long in my opinion.

Coming to the movie itself. It is a movie shot in splendour and is going to be known for perfect casting, breathtaking cinematography and poignant love story. Breaking it down into smaller parts :

Casting:

• Hrithik is Akbar in all his glory. He fits the part to a T. I have read several comments where he is too young to portray Akbar but not true. The story is of a young Akbar. He fits it beautifully. I dont know of any other actor who could have portrayed Akbar in all his "humanness" so well. We all know about Akbar the emperor and the statesman. But this movie is of Akbar the man who falls in love with a beautiful woman who happens to be his wife.


• Aishwarya Rai as Jodha is breathtakingly beautiful and is haunting in most scenes. The only other person who could have played this role to perfection is probably Madhuri Dixit in her heydays. Aishwarya does the role with poise, grace and perfection. She is superb to say the least.


• Ila Aruni as Badi Ammi is most perfectly cast and is a pleasure to watch. She portrays her rage and angst very vividly and with aplomb. Her eyes speak more than her mouth.


• Sonu Sood as Sujamal is very aptly cast. He is easy on the eyes and very believeable in the war scene and during his discussion with Safiruddin.

Cinematography:

Kiran Deohans has excelled himself. The war scenes and the song sequences are very nicely picturised and very grand and opulent. The use of camels, elephants and infantry is very apt and adds a nice touch of authenticy and adds the "periodness" to the film. The song sequences for Khwaja mere khwaja song and for the Azeem-o-shaan-shahenshah is very nicely done.

Direction:

Ashutosh did a great job with Lagaan and he has maintained the same name for Jodha Akbar also. He has done a lot of research for this movie and is shows in his locale choices, costume choices and casting choices. The romance between Akbar and Jodha is understated and gradual. No overt shows of passion or loveplay is exhibited and it is very fitting for a romance between an emperor and his wife. The war sequence and the sword play and the fight sequnece at the end is very well done. Here are some of his best directional sequences:

• The taming of the elephant by Akbar and especially the final jump he takes to sit on the elephant's back.


• The song Khwaja mere khwaja where Akbar himself joins in with the singers. Very well shot.


• Akbar's concentration falters when he is listening to Badi Ammi's lecture when he sees Jodha in the pavilion.


• Jodha's fascination with Akbar while Akbar is practising sword play without his top. That's where Jodha first falls for Akbar I think. What a physique Hrithik has! Total eye candy!! One of the best scenes in the whole film.


• Jodha and Akbar's sword play in Ajmer and their fascination with each other during the entire sequence.


• The picturisation of Azeem-o-shaan-shahenshah song.


• The final one on one fight with Sharifuddin.

Music:

Music by A. R. Rahman is very melodious but not his best. The songs are lilting and catchy but none stand out exceptionally. Defininely good but not outstanding.

All in all, this movie is woth watching on the big screen. Once the DVD comes out, it is definitley worth purchasing and keeping it in one's personal collection. If you get a chance to see it on the big screen, please go and watch it on the silver screen.

Kay gives it an 8 out of 10.

Kay...

Giri tuns 42!!

I cant believe it but Giri is 42. He turned 42 on March 21st. I am officially married to a mama now. When I was a kid growing up, I always thought of 40s being way up in the coot area. I thought 20s was cool, 30s was old and anything above the 40s were ancient. Imagine my consternation that my darling hubby is 42 !!!! The funny thing is he does not feel old and I dont feel old either. I am 38 myself. Actually I feel that I am in my prime now. Better than I ever felt in my 20s.

Growing up during my teens, I was always a tad chubby so I never felt totally comfortable in cool clothes and savvy outfits. Growing up in suburban Madurai which is a big village did not help! When I reached my 20s life was a little better. I had a couple of degrees under my belt and had the vast! experience of a college grad and thought myself invincible. But the pressures of getting married and moving to a new country took its toll on me. I had to change careers , ended up going to grad school in the US and spent most of my 20s in school and trying to manage on a single income. Life was not bad but not great either. Next came my 30s - the so called Wonder Years in my life. I graduated from grad school and got a great job in Compaq. I had lots of money and ended up spending as I liked on manicures, pedicures and designer DKNY jeans..


Then came motherhood and all the associated issues with it. Life is busy but not too bad. I have kind of found my niche so to speak. I am more outspoken about the issues that I am passionate about, have more patience than before and best of all I dont give a hoot what others think. I have come to the conclusion, that people always have a say in everything we do. Be it a mom, mother in law, fried, husband or neighbor. I haven't reached the stage where my kids will start giving me input but I am sure it is not too far away.. My daughter is 3 going on 13 already and I am sure we are going to butt heads in the future. I digress, but coming back to the subject, people like to comment on everything we do. I have reached a stage, where I can brush it off and do exactly what I want to do. I dont care anymore. I think I have the age, mental maturity, confidence and right to do what I want without someone's opinion affect me. And that my friends is the key thing I have learnt in my 30s. Not to give a damn about people's opinions and just do whatever it takes to get the job done to my satisfaction.


That is the most important lesson I have learnt in my 30s and that is to be comfortable in my own skin and I think it is the most valuable lesson of all. Coming back to Giri's birthday, he has always been very sure of himself and has never let anybody's else's ideas, opinions affect him one way or the other. I don't know if he was born that way or is it just the way he learnt to deal with people on his own. Whatever it is, he is a great guy and I am very fortunate to have him as a life partner. He is my partner in the true sense of the word and I wish him many many more happy birthdays and a long and illustrious life...

Kay..